My Dirty Little Secret
by Dylixia
Summary: They risk it all for one night together. They've had to be cold and ignore their morals but Naruto might not be able to take the guilt anymore, no matter how good this feels. Oneshot, song-fic to Dirty Little Secret by AAR /Sasuke x Naruto\


**My Dirty Little Secret - A SasuNaru song-fic**

**My first fanfic on this site- REWRITTEN - because it was so goddamn awful!**

I am SO grateful for all the faves and reviews, you guys, but I think you're crazy! xD This story was so embarrassingly bad! It buuuurned my eyes when I read it again! Anyways, I'm rewriting all my old stories, so I hope you like it! The second half of this was just rewritten with so much difficultly physically.. I've fractured my finger, yesterday, and am disobeying doctor's orders of elevation to bring you thiiiis... So it better be worth it! Please review - especially with critique and especially if you read it when it was first published and have re-read it!

Thank you!

**Warning: **Lemon, cursing, un-beta'd crappiness.

**Pairing: **Sasuke x Naruto

**Rating: **M

**Dirty Little Secret (C)** The All-American Rejects

* * *

Running.

I was running so fast, lungs screaming for air and heart pounding in my chest in time to the beating of my shoes against the pavement. Beads of sweat formed on my brow and trickled down my cheeks and I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose at the unpleasant sensation. It was worse when the cold night air hit my skin and cooled down the drops of perspiration, sending a shiver down my spine. Sprinting through the old town, I noted that its long, winding streets were empty. There was nothing but the leaves swirling through the air, scuttling at my feet as I increased my pace. Over time, I had come to know this town almost as well as I knew my own. Every month, on the 13th day, Jiraiya and I _always_ returned to this town. His excuse is that he's here to "Catch up with some old friends.", but I know that these _friends_ of his are young women and he's just here for their services. Still, I never complain, because I always got something out of these trips anyway; I got to see _him._

My teeth were chattering from the cold air's harsh bites at my body but I simply grit my teeth and ignored it, stepping out onto the main street of the Waterfall Village. It was a small town set deep in the mountains but somehow, the wind managed to whistle through the valley, the village not protected at all. Not tonight, at least. For its age, it was a pleasant place to stay. It had enough facilities for us- we didn't want much- and it was halfway between the Sound and Konoha. That's why I meet him here, to see each other at a convenient and easily reachable place.

"Naruto-san?" A familiar voice sounded behind me.

Freezing in my tracks, in the middle of a dimly-lit street, I swallowed hard and braced myself. When I turned around, careful and aware, I relaxed upon seeing who had caught me. It was Nyoko, one of the friends I'd made during our short stays in the village. Though I knew she was no threat, my heart still insistently pounded against my chest. The fear of discovery sent adrenaline burning through my veins. Che, what a stupid thing to get worked up over.

"Nyoko-chan! You scared me!" I chuckled humorlessly, the sound ringing of nervousness and anxiety as I adjusted my headband on my forehead. "What are you doing out here?"

Her wide green eyes scanned my face. She was only young, but she was wary of me. Shifting uncomfortably in my place as I was eager to leave, I forced a small smile onto my lips. When in doubt; smile.

"Just putting out the trash." Nyoko answered, gesturing to the black trashcan bag in her hand. "What are _you_ doing out here? The inn is in the opposite direction to where you're heading."

_Damn it._

"Oh, I'm just out on a little night walk. I can't sleep tonight... I'm just clearing my head." I lied, averting my gaze from her own curious one as I pushed away the worry settling on my mind.

A panicked look appears on her face and her brunette bangs sway with her movement as she hastily flings the full black bag into the bin and swings back round to face me, her hands wringing together.  
Her panic sort of flows through to me and I stare at her blankly, feeling the first pinpricks of guilt in my chest. She's only eleven years old- she'd never even understand what it is that I'm doing now, let alone _accept _it.

"You're not leaving are you, Naruto-san? You're not supposed to leave for another three days!" She cried, eyebrows knitting together as she took a small step towards me. "Please don't go!"

I smiled at the display of affection and shook my head.

"No, Nyoko. I'm just out on a walk." Absently, I peered up at the ink-black sky and at the moon hanging like a jewel amongst the dark clouds. Looking back at her, I pretended to be stern. "You better get to bed, you. It's late... almost eleven PM." I tutted, playfully.

Smiling softly, Nyoko nodded once and turned to enter her house. Pausing at the door, she grinned at me.

"Goodnight, Naruto-niisan." She whispered, before closing the door.

Hovering for only a second longer, I hesitantly continued my walk. Eyes searching the area around me quickly, I checked that no-one else had seen me. Complications like that were bad for my heart and conscience, I swear. Lying had always left a bitter taste in my mouth; I hated it. Honesty had always been one of the traits of my personality that I prided myself on. Then... things changed and deceiving my friends and companions like this became a necessity. It wasn't just the people of the Waterfall Village that I was lying to- it was the people back home in Konoha, too. Missing-nin were always supposed to be reported to the officials- it was our duty as shinobi of the Leaf Village. Though guilt was something I'd always struggled with, it had gradually gotten easier for me to deal with. Unfortunately, I'd had to admit that it meant I had become selfish.

He told me once that lying was getting tiresome for him, too. Initially, I had immediately jumped to the conclusion that he was putting a stop to the meetings, but thankfully, he wasn't. It seemed to be an innocent statement, but I wasn't stupid. I knew there was an unspoken warning in those words... I just didn't want to acknowledge it. I didn't want to stop.

_**Let me know that I've done wrong**__**  
**__**When I've known this all along**_

Paranoia was clouding my mind, so I instinctively checked behind me every time I turned a corner. It was ridiculous, but it made me feel just a little bit better, as stupid as it was. Stepping out of the gates, I straightened out my orange and black jacket, pulling it closer around me to ward off the cold. My feet were starting to get tired, so I slowed to walking from the light jog I was keeping up before. It would probably irritate him that I was going to be late, but I couldn't really bring myself to care. He'd have to deal with it. The chilly night air burned my cheeks a rosy red, so with a drawn-out sigh, I rubbed at them with the palms of my cold hands, tracing over the whisker-like scars across them. Suddenly, an annoying bout of paranoia swamped me again. Bottom lip threatening to start trembling, I bit down on it, shoving my hands deep into my pockets and walking faster. I started humming to myself, trying to drag away the loneliness of the empty night, of the empty work my life had become since he left.

Scowling at my own depressing thoughts, I recognised my surroundings. I was far from the village borders by now, and the entry that I always took through to the forest was coming up ahead. Upon seeing it, I sped up, turning from a brisk walk to a quick sprint.

Though I could be determined most of the time, my mind somehow couldn't fight off the pessimistic, brooding thoughts for long. As I picked my way through the trees, I frowned at the grassy floor beneath my feet. This was all such a big deal- the sneaking around, the lying, the pretending- all to see some guy who is ignorant of how much his leaving tore me up inside. Sakura and Kakashi knew how much it affected me, but I could always put on a brave face around him, against all odds. I'd have to be a fool to believe that he didn't notice the way I was around him. He was known for his perceptive skills, after all. There was no way he had missed how emotional I got around him. Of course... he didn't show that he noticed. He wouldn't dare break his cold, distant persona, even if it slipped when he was around me.

Maybe I was pathetic for clinging to this opportunity like I did. Was I really that lonely- so lonely that I would put myself through all this because I'd finally found someone who understood me in ways no-one else could? Despite how tough I'd like to seem, I knew it was true. I was. That's why the level of connection I had with Sasuke was so important to me and that's why I couldn't let him go.

_**I go around a time or two  
Just to waste my time with you**_

Stumbling through the forest, over broken twigs, decaying leaves and awkwardly situated rocks, I soldiered on. The moon was the only light to aid my vision, but my eyes easily adjusted to darkness anyway, so it wasn't too hard to pick my way through the trees. As the terrain evened out and the trees dispersed into a small clearing, my heart gave a heavy, longing thump in my chest.

On a large, flat rock in the centre of the clearing, he sat there. He didn't turn to look at me when I entered the clearing but I knew he had heard me, sensed my presence- probably much earlier before I arrived, actually. Cautiously, I walked around the rock to approach him, my eyes trained on him as I did so. He was staring up at the moon glowing in the dark sky and its pale silver rays just made him look even more breathtaking. It highlighted the navy hue to his black hair and there was a glint in his dark eyes, picked up on by the moonlight. Silently, I cursed the way his appearance affected me, even after all this time... after all these nights of intimacy, I was still noticing these little details. Still feeling my heart pound harder at drinking in his appearance like that. That, I supposed, was what love does to you. Though the thought should have been a sweet one, it was bitter in my mind.

Even when I was standing directly in front of him, he did not actively acknowledge my presence, he continued to stare blankly at the sky. Silently, I sat down beside him on the rock, trying to relax my tense muscles. It irritated me, how he ignored me, but I wasn't in the mood to challenge it. Instead of greeting him, I let myself relax a little. The stress of getting here could dissolve and disappear completely- now, I would enjoy Sasuke's company while I could.

"You came." He states, surprising me with his sudden words.

Shrugging, I turned my head to look at him. With a spark of annoyance, I saw that he still hadn't looked at me yet. "I always do." I countered, voice stiff as a sort of tension settled between us.

Seemingly un-fazed by the tone of my voice, Sasuke turned to me, one raven eyebrow raised condescendingly.

"Yes." He agreed, leaning in closer to me. "But this time, you're late."

His breath ghosted over my lips and I held back a shiver at the proximity. Instinctively, my eyes dropped to his lips, so close to my own, as I explained.

"I got held up."

Brushing his lips against mine in a mind-blowingly teasing way, Sasuke smirked slightly. "So did I, but I still beat you here."

"Jerk." I chided, but without rising to the bait completely, I closed the gap between us and pressed our lips together.

As expected, Sasuke didn't even flinch at the sudden movement, he just leaned into the kiss, a gloved hand coming up to rest on my shoulder and steady me as he applied more pressure to my lips.  
Though my head jolted backwards with the sudden force, I recovered quickly and responded with equal vigour. Our lips moved together, warm and soft despite the cold temperature around us. When the need for air became too much, we slowly pulled away. All of my senses tingling from the intensity of our reunion kiss, I leaned my forehead against his and looked into his onyx eyes.

"I've missed you." I whispered, bracing myself for his reaction. I wasn't really expecting one- displaying emotion wasn't exactly Sasuke's strong point. Usually, it just made him awkward and distant. After all, it's one of the main reasons he left Konoha. He was afraid that we, his friends and whatever else, would make him forget about his goal.

After a second of silence, Sasuke slowly licked his lips and brought his hand up to my neck, fingertips massaging the skin gently. "I've missed you too."

The way his tone rang of sincerity sent warmth rippling throughout my chest. Resisting the urge to break out in a massive, goofy grin, I settled for a small smile instead. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I tugged him marginally closer.

"I knew it." I murmured before crashing our lips together. The pace was faster, the kiss harder and more urgent.

I made a small noise of contentment into the bruising kiss and Sasuke responded by tracing the seam of my lips with his tongue, silently requesting entrance. It surprised me a little, because usually, things went slower and when we _did_ finally get to this stage, he wouldn't bother asking. He'd just dive in and do what he wanted, like he always did. The little display of consideration threw me off a little but I knew better than to mention it and potentially ruin tonight. Gladly, I parted my lips and his warm, wet tongue tenderly touched mine as his fingers trailed along my neck slowly. Kiss becoming less hurried, our tongues slid together in a slow, sensual movement before our lips parted with a soft 'smack' noise and we tried to regain control of our breathing.  
Though my heart was beating fast and hard, I didn't mind the kiss ending because instead, he draped his arm over my shoulders and we sat together in silence, just enjoying each other's company. The kiss had just been our own little 'hello' after all.

We could have been sitting there for many minutes, but I didn't notice. As cliché as it sounds, it was hard to keep track of time when I was with Sasuke. Perhaps it's because some part of me liked to believe that we had all the time in the world, when we really only had one night. Shifting against him, I buried my face in the soft white fabric of his shirt. It was the same style as the one he always wore- open wide and revealing most of his smooth, hairless torso. While I didn't mind the view, I couldn't help but worry for his health. It was a freezing night in the middle of winter- he was probably going to catch a cold or something. We only had our body heat to keep us warm. Whatever, it was his own fault if he got ill. I couldn't control him... that much was obvious in all aspects of our relationship.

"Sometimes..." He broke the silence and I actually almost jumped at the sound. "I want to come back."

I couldn't believe my ears. Pulling away from the light embrace enough to look at him with wide, questioning eyes, I felt hope spark weakly in my chest. "What?!"

"I just don't feel that it was worth it, sometimes." There was a hint of longing to his voice but the look in his eyes told me not to misunderstand. "It doesn't mean anything though."

My hands balled into fists, my nails scraping against the rock as they did so. Fighting back the angry, hurt tears that always threatened to start pouring out whenever I thought about Sasuke's absence from my life, I fixed him with a pained glare.

"Why? Of course it means something! It means _everything!_" I cried. "You could come back! We.. we'd talk with the Hokage, get her to let you back in without any repercussions! We could be Team 7 again!"

"That's not going to happen, Naruto. It may not be the ideal situation, but I'm getting stronger." Slowly curling his fingers into a fist against his chest, Sasuke looked down at it with a wistful expression. "I can finally get my revenge." Then cold black eyes fixed on me. "I'm not coming back."

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I looked at him pleadingly. "We could be together." I was getting too caught up in the idea of everything being perfect again, but in the back of my mind, I knew that I'd already lost the battle.

"We're together now." My best friend insisted, hesitantly reaching out to cup my cheek with a gloved hand as he offered me a sad, apologetic smile. "It's the best I can do."

Refusing to accept an apology for something as serious as that, I hastily turned my face away from his palm, avoiding his gaze.

"Sometimes the best you can do isn't good enough." I snapped.

Sasuke's hand dropped back to the surface of the rock and his jaw tightened as if I had broken his display of uncharacteristically blatant affection with those words. He frowned, eyes narrowed at me.

"If you don't appreciate it," he ground out through clenched teeth. "then maybe _this _should stop altogether. I risk a lot to be with you for this one goddamn night every month. Don't you understand anything, you moron?"

Feeling my own temper fire up, I sat up straighter, preparing to get up and leave... even if I didn't want to. Hell, this could easily turn into a fight in the blink of an eye. With Sasuke, I didn't know what to expect, which is why I made a point to never expect anything from him. It made the disappointment easier to cope with.

"Maybe it's you who doesn't understand." I hissed, jabbing a finger into his chest. "I go through more than you do for all of this. I sneak around, I lie, I deal with the guilt every day and I still keep coming back. For you."

His onyx eyes closed and I watched his chest rise as he inhaled deeply, calming himself. "Look, coming back is just something I can't do."

I didn't reply and he took my silence as acceptance. Leaning in, he tried to kiss me. Shocked, I jerked backwards, gawping at him in disbelief.

"Is this just physical for you or what?" I demanded, turning my head from him.

Frowning, Sasuke let out a small growl of anger at my reaction. "Yes, of course it is. I risk life and limb to come all this way for the _sex_."

His sarcasm didn't help my rapidly worsening mood.

"Fuck you and your sarcasm." I bit, crossing my arms. "If it's not just physical to you then what is it? Am I just your consolation- your link to Konoha so you won't feel guilty?"

Sasuke just stared at me, eyes blank and lip tightened into a thin line as he watched my agitation growing.

"Are you using me to convince yourself that things are still okay? Does screwing around make you feel like you didn't hurt anyone- didn't hurt _me_, because if you did then I wouldn't come back?" I leaned closer to him and shoved hard at his shoulders with both of my hands.

Instantly, his hands wrapped around my wrists and he tugged me towards him so that I went crashing into his chest. I tried to wrestle my hands away so that I could punch him for it, but his grip was too strong.

"Listen, you _idiot_." He growled, digging his nails into the flesh of my wrists. "I'm doing this because I _love_ you and I can't let _go._ Trust me, if I could stop, then I damn well would."

Stunned at such a confession, I stopped struggling, going lax in his tight hold. I had never thought that he would actually say something like that- hell, I had never thought that he was in love with me, despite everything we did. Though it was a lost cause from the start, I tried to play the guilt card.

"If you loved me, you'd come back."

Brushing his lips along my cheekbone, Sasuke pressed a light kiss to my jaw.

"Stop it." He told me, though his voice was as soft as the kisses he planted on my jawline and it held no anger or resent regarding the argument that we'd just had. "You know that I'm not lying. Stop trying to change my mind and just accept this. You have to."

Reluctantly giving into him, I let him kiss me gently on the lips.

"I don't have to." I sniffed defiantly. With a tiny smile, I added, "But I will."

"Good." He returned, holding onto my forearms and pushing me back onto the rock so that I was laying beneath him. "We'll be together properly someday."

_**Tell me all that you've thrown away  
Find out games you don't wanna play**_

"We better be." I shut my eyes tightly as he smashed our lips together, kissing me heatedly.

Drawing back, he straddled my hips and his nimble fingers unzipped my jacket.

"Thank you." He muttered, sliding a hand under my plain black t-shirt to trail it down my stomach. His hand was warm but I shivered anyways, feeling his hand slip further up my chest for his palm to brush over a nipple in a teasing manner. "As long as _you_ know that I love you... no-one else needs to know."

_**You are the only one that needs to know **_

The cold of the stone I lay on started to seep through my jacket but I couldn't complain because Sasuke's hand was hot against my skin. I soon forgot about it anyways as Sasuke leant down to attach his lips to my neck. Gasping at the searing hot kisses and harsh bites at the sensitive skin, I fisted my hands in the fabric of the shirt on his back.

"I don't want to lose you completely, Naruto. That's why..." He paused to graze my neck with his teeth. "This has to continue to be our secret. They don't have to know."

It was getting harder to breathe with each passing second but I managed to reply. "I'll keep this... secret."

Sasuke smirked at my answer and bit down harder at my neck. I made a small noise of surprise and pleasure before twining my fingers in his raven spikes and tugging his face back up to my own.

"Our dirty little secret." He mused. A part of me wondered why he was so caught up on the secrecy of it all, but from the smirk playing on his lips, he enjoyed talking to me like this, so I didn't object. In fact, I couldn't do anything at all because his hand was trailing down my body to my pants.

_**I'll keep you my dirty little secret  
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret  
My dirty little secret**_

Cupping my crotch, Sasuke rubbed hard, sending a shudder of pleasure throughout my whole body. Our lips met again and it was all heat and speed; a fast, burning kiss as our tongues slid together and I found myself growing hard under his persistent hand. Slowly, his hand unbuttoned my trousers and dipped past the waistband of my boxers to slide along my half-erect length. My quiet moan was muffled by his mouth moving against mine so I responded to the heated touch instead by bucking into his hot hand. Feeling me pushing into his touch like I did, Sasuke smirked against my lips and pulled away. I was about to curse him for cutting off the kiss so abruptly but it suddenly became hard to complain when his mouth moved to my neck. As his teeth grazed over the sensitive skin and it became harder to breathe, I took a moment to let the whole situation sink in.

It all felt so _surreal_. One year ago, nothing like this would ever have crossed my mind. I was oblivious to my own feelings and Sasuke's- it wasn't until he left that they rose to the surface, dredged up by the intensity of the pain that I felt knowing he wasn't going to be around every day anymore. Lying there, beneath my ex-team-mate, who was also my rival, as he pleasured me as my _lover_. As the guilt residing in my heart bubbled to the surface, I felt myself almost erupting into bitter laughter. Everyone in Konoha was _clueless_. They had no idea where Sasuke was, they were oblivious to what went on between me and him. In fact.. that made me just as much a traitor to my village as he was... Even though they may have missed him as much as I did, there would not be empathy enough to save me from punishment if the truth ever came out. Along with the guilt and shame that would come along with the public humiliation, I would probably never be able to see Sasuke again.

The people of the village would never understand my loneliness because they never experienced the same hardships as I did... and for that reason, they would not be merciless. They would never understand my reasoning for risking life and limb to see a _traitor_. For this reason, they could never know.

_**Who has to know  
When we live such fragile lives**_

Sasuke's teeth nipped at the juncture of my neck and shoulder- an action that he knew drove me crazy every time he did it. Gasping, I slid my hand into his raven spikes, encouraging him to continue. Each touch was awakening a new feeling within me- a new emotion that had been buried beneath my daily life until I saw Sasuke again. Layers of stress and determination weaved together over the pain and love that embodied what I felt for Sasuke. Of course, even when I was away from him, I was still his possession. He still poisoned all of my thoughts, controlled them, controlled _me.._

As hurtful a reason as it was, Sasuke had become my driving force and my fuel, spurring me on to become a better ninja.

_**It's the best way we survive**_

That's why I fought as hard as I could on every mission, every fight. I trained to get better, to get stronger.. So that one day, I'd be able to fight Sasuke- or maybe just fight to earn his respect- and he would come home. Then we could be together; pressed tightly together, chest to chest, like this, all the time.

_**I go around a time or two  
Just to waste my time with you**_

Sasuke's skilled and confident hand wrapped around my arousal and his thumb lazily wiped away the pre-cum beading at the tip. Head thrown back in pleasure, I allowed a shuddering moan to escape my lips, breath visible in the cold night air. My eyes wanted to flutter closed at the tingling sensation of the pleasure steadily building in my body, but I forced myself to keep them open. I wanted to see Sasuke's face, but instead of being able to enjoy the slight vulnerability I was expecting to see in his dark eyes; I saw nothing. There was no expression in them, no light- just an endless pool of darkness. Angered and almost hurt by the lack of emotion, I moved my hand over his back to the back of his neck. Fingertips digging against the skin, I pulled him down for a violent kiss, crashing our lips together and succeeding in receiving a surprised grunt from him. At least he wasn't being silent anymore.

The kiss continued as Sasuke worked my trousers down past my hips to my knees and I kicked my legs to get them off completely, Sasuke breaking the kiss for only a second to pull off my shoes before his warm hand returned to my hard-on. When we finally stopped for air, we stared at each other for a long time, chests heaving and eyes intense, darkened by lust. Silently, Sasuke straddled my hips, a knee on either side of my body as he rid himself of the rope tied around his waist, hands then quickly moving to unzip his trousers. I averted my eyes, out of habit rather than an actual attempt to save any embarrassment, as he pushed them down. My attention was recaptured when I felt Sasuke's fingertips grazing lightly over my cheeks. Startled, I looked at him questioningly but my eyes snapped almost instantly to his newly revealed chest. Slowly, I laid my palms out against his bare skin, feeling the heat against my own. Sasuke's hands slid up into my hair and as I threw him a strange look, he undid the loose knot on my forehead protector and let it drop to the floor. I frowned, but didn't bother asking him what he was doing. Maybe he was just removing the connection I had to Konoha, even if it was just temporarily. I didn't know quite what he meant when he did that but I wouldn't get a straight answer if I tried to find out.

He was fully naked, pale skin catching the moonlight and almost _glowing_ from it, and my heart was pounding in my chest. I bit the inside of my lip in anticipation as he lowered his hips, causing his erection to slide against mine. Grinding hard against me, he let his own eyes slip closed and I drank in the content look on his face. It was beautiful. But, like most beautiful things, it was fleeting, for his eyes opened again and burned into mine as he sat back on the rock, kneeling between my legs. As he pushed them apart further, I tried to gain control of my heartbeat. I knew what was coming when he sucked quietly on his fingers, coating them in saliva before one of the slick digits circled my entrance, dipping in only slightly. Growling a little when he went no further, I bucked my hips upwards impatiently.

"Sasuke, do it." I commanded, voice low and husky.

A dark chuckle was all the reply I received and I knew that if my eyes sought his face once more, I would see his lips turned up in a smirk. Meeting my demand, Sasuke slowly slid a finger inside of me. Relaxing, I tried not to tense up at the intrusion and it worked because not ten seconds after the first, a second was added. The slightest twinges of pain were sent up my spine at this but I simply grit my teeth as he prepared me.

"Ready?" He drawled, tone teasingly bored because we both knew he didn't really have to ask but he got his kicks from treating me like an idiot sometimes.

I gave a hurried nod, a small jerk of my head in answer, and there was some shuffling as he positioned himself above me. When I felt the head of his length pressing against me, I shivered with anticipation. Finally, gripping my hips hard, he pushed inside. The tingling sensation of being filled completely flooded through my veins, overrunning the slight twinges of pain. Squeezing my eyes shut hard, I heard Sasuke release a shuddering breath above me as he sheathed himself completely. When my eyes opened to see the breath dissipating into nothing in the cold night air, his hips started to move. My heart was already pounding in my chest and the insistent thumping just got louder as Sasuke withdrew almost all the way before thrusting his hips forward again, brushing against that spot inside of me that enticed a loud gasp from my kiss-swollen lips.

His body moved above mine, thrusts slow and even in rhythm as the ecstasy buzzed in my blood and my hips snapped upwards to meet his. My blonde bangs became dampened by sweat and hung into my eyes but that didn't matter because they were squeezed tightly closed, my mouth open as breathy moans fell from my lips. I was so lost in the feeling of Sasuke inside of me that it took my lust-clouded brain a few minutes to catch up when Sasuke started to pull out of me, though both of us were still hard.

Exhaling slowly and deeply, Sasuke wrapped his hands around my arms and tugged me to a sitting position. Opening my mouth to protest, I sent him an angry glare. My patience was running thin.

"I want you on top of me." He breathed, his hot hands slipping down my arms to grip my hips. Leaning forward, he stroked at my length with a teasing, persuasive hand as he kissed my neck. "I want a good view of your face when you cum."

My heart jumped a little at this but defiantly, I moved my hand over his and pushed them away from my skin. Curling my lips up into a smirk despite the desperation to be touched that I felt, I sat back on his thighs and folded my arms over my chest.

"What if I don't want to be on top?" I challenged playfully, but Sasuke's deep growl let his impatience shine through his expressionless mask.

Gripping my hips again, hard, he pulled me forwards until I was hovering over his hips. He tried in vain to push me down onto his length again but, going against all my instincts and raging hormones, I tensed up and didn't budge an inch.

"I'm not going to play your _games_, Naruto." Sasuke hissed, nails digging into my hips.

_**Tell me all that you've thrown away  
Find out games you don't wanna play  
You are the only one that needs to know**_

Rolling my eyes at his lack of patience, no matter how hypocritical the action made me, I laid my palm on his chest and pushed him down so that he lay beneath me.

"Why's it so important to you?" I asked, voice teasing. Rocking my hips, I slid our erections together and watched Sasuke's eyes squeeze tightly shut and his head jerk back as the friction sent pleasure through his body. "You that desperate to see my handsome face?"

Letting out a strangled cry of frustration, Sasuke insistently jerked my hips down.

"Hurry _up_!" He demanded.

"Tch, you're so _dirty_, Sasuke." I mused, but left the cruel banter at that as I lowered my body, impaling myself on him once more.

_**I'll keep you my dirty little secret**_  
_**Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret.**_

I started off slow, raising and lowering my body in languid, pleasure-intense moments, savouring the feeling of Sasuke moving inside of me. Although I was now fairly quiet, too choked up with pleasure and breathing to hard to make any noise at all, Sasuke had become quite the vocal one. His hands travelled up my back as he groaned loudly, bucking his hips to meet my thrusts and consequently sliding deeper into me. Letting out a soft moan, I tilted my head back and felt the cold night wind caressing my heated skin. I felt so alive in that moment and it was amazing. Feeling fingertips digging into my back, I opened my eyes and fixed them on Sasuke as I moved atop him. He was staring at me with an amused look in his dark eyes.

"Seems.. _you_ are the... dirty one." He smirked, words broken by harsh breathing as he let his hands drift down to their resting place on my hips. When I didn't reply; too caught up in his curious expression, he pushed me onto his length, hard and quick. I cried out at the slight twinge of pain but all I could really feel was the mind-numbing pleasure. Smirk widening at my wordless response, Sasuke continued. "_**My dirty little secret.**_"

I wanted to grin at this but I was coming close to orgasm, rendering me unable to speak as my chest burned for more oxygen and my blood pumped fast through my veins. As I was about to fall over the brink of orgasm, a girl's face flashed in my mind.  
It was blurred at first; an unrecognisable blur of pale skin, jade green eyes... and then I recognised the petal-pink of her hair and saw the trails of tears slipping down flushed cheeks. Sakura. It was the image of her that was burned into my mind- how she looked when she begged me to bring Sasuke home. I remember, so clearly, the pain I felt for her... from her... from the way her heart was breaking into bloody shards in her chest as she pleaded desperately for help. Guilt flooded me.

If she found out... My eyes snapped open and I stared down at Sasuke with my eyes threatening to water. No, she could _never _know of this. It would destroy her and she would never forgive me. In this instance, ignorance truly is bliss.

_**Who has to know**_  
_**The way she feels inside  
**_

An almost physical pain sparks up in my heart at the thought of the pain she must be in. She waits at home; training and getting stronger but all the while longing after Sasuke, her 'love'. She missed him no end, but here he lay, beneath me, pleasuring me and only me. I had what she craved but would never know or have.

The pleasure was getting to be too much and combined with the guilt, it made me want to cry. Moving my hips quicker, I tried to clean my mind of the dirty guilt. _Why won't her image go away?_

_**Those thoughts I can't deny  
These sleeping dogs won't lie**_

I was so caught up in Sasuke, so caught up in this twisted life I'd made and the role he played in it. He understood how I felt, and through it all, I believe that he felt the same way. He'd never admit it, but I knew it was true. I saw it in his burning black eyes: he'd come back to Konoha someday. The nagging feeling weighing down in my stomach tried to tell me otherwise, but I ignored its existence.

_**And now I try to lie  
It's eating me apart  
Trace this life out**_

One sharp thrust later and I came, orgasm ripping through my tired body as I let out a loud cry. Riding it out, I felt Sasuke's hot seed fill me and I all but collapsed against his chest, wet and sticky. The guilt and Sakura's image faded away and I felt fine again. I felt amazing.

_**I'll keep you my dirty little secret**_

This is why we kept silent. This bliss, post-coitus, is why we risked it all.

_**Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret**_

We were an odd pair- messed up in the head and torn up in our hearts.. but somehow, our jagged little pieces fit together, more tightly and perfectly than we could ever imagine. No-one could ever know about this until we could be together. No-one was going to take this away from me.

_**I'll keep you my dirty little secret  
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret**_

My eyes fluttered open when I felt strong arms encircle me. Tired, I let Sasuke move us until he was no longer inside of me and we were curled up together on the cold stone, buzzing in the aftermath. Tilting my head up, I kissed him fiercely, hotly and wetly, using the last of my energy. I felt his lips curl into a smile against my forehead as he held me against his chest, unusually affectionate once more.

_**"I'll keep you my dirty little secret."**_ He whispered contently, a humorous edge to his husky voice.

My throat was sore from my ragged breathing but I lightly thumped my head disapprovingly against his chest.

"You make me sound like a little whore." I objected, smiling slightly.

He chuckles dryly.

"Maybe you are my little whore- my mistress." He whispers, nuzzling my cheek.

_**Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret**_

"You managed to make it sound so sexy and secretive before. Now you just sound skanky." I snickered, sighing tiredly. Sleep was whining for me to give in but I struggled on, enjoying this light atmosphere.

There was a moment of silence as Sasuke moved an arm to pick up my discarded jacket and a small blanket that he always brings with him whenever we meet up. The jacket was bundled up into a makeshift pillow and with a few noises of irritation at the numerous attempts that it took to get it straight, the blanket was thrown over us and I curled up beneath it.

"_**My dirty little secret**_." Sasuke murmured quietly, as if tasting the words on his tongue.

After what could have been only a few seconds, Sasuke's breathing evened out and I realised he was asleep. Smiling sadly to myself, I felt my heart give a pang of longing in my chest. I wanted this to happen more often.

"_**Dirty little secret**_." I pondered aloud, considering the term. "_**Dirty little secret**_..Hn."

Sasuke's body heat sending a warmth through my body, I banished the sadness to another time in the future. When it was over, I'd angst about it then. For now, I enjoyed it; remembered why I did it. The adrenaline and the excitement had something to do with it, as did the sex. But really.. it was a connection to Sasuke.. my feelings for him.

What Sakura didn't know couldn't hurt her. We weren't hurting anyone. If anything, _I_ was the one most likely to be subject to emotional harm from this setup. Perhaps I invested too much of myself in Sasuke. Either way, nothing would change.

Reveling in the sense of closeness that had wrapped its soothing self around me, I let my eyes drift closed.

_**"Who has to know?" **_I whispered aloud._**"Who has to know...."**_

Guilt forgotten and heart swelling in my chest, I fell asleep where I should always have been; as a dirty little secret in my forbidden lover's arms.

* * *

**AND IT'S DONE. Jeez, I hate fractured bones.. I made about 100 typos writing this, I swear... and I logged off once, almost did it twice… just because my left hand (the injured one) keeps hitting the wrong keys… -sigh- **

**Iloveyou.**


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